Choice Determines Change
Life is all about choices; those that were and are made for us, and the many we decide ourselves.
Sometimes we make choices that we are satisfied with and even proud of; and other times we make choices which lead to us feeling regretful, frustrated and even resentful, angry or sad.
In my time on the couch, I often find clients experiencing shame, guilt and other very difficult emotions regarding choices they have made or continue to make, that they can’t see they have the power and autonomy to change. With this comes the gentle reminder that we make between 33,000 to 35,000 choices and decisions each day, extending from simple choices such as ‘What should I eat for breakfast?’ to more complicated decisions like ‘should I tell my partner the truth?’.
Choosing not to make a change is still a choice! human beings are however known for being resistant to new situations as this involves navigating unknown territory with new consequences of potential decisions and unknown affects it could hold.
The choices we consciously and unconsciously make determine our behaviour, attitudes and outcomes both in current and later life. There are many steps and techniques a person utilises when making any choice. These steps vary although all include;
Identifying the decision. You realize that you need to make a decision
Gathering relevant information
Identifying alternative options
Considering the pros and cons of each choice
Evaluating the evidence
Choosing alternatives
Taking action
Reviewing the decision and its consequences.
What we choose to do each day determines our future, with life being a practice of who and what we want to be. Pondering the question of whether a particular choice is getting you closer or further away from who you want to be and where you want your life to go is important. Life is a book of chapters, and you can write a new one whenever you choose to.
My final word of advice is to have some fun and test things out, like an experiment on your own life. For example, if you tend to wear black to work most days, why not introduce some blue or green to bring new energy to your day. If you find cooking a drag, why not spend your scrolling time researching one new (easy enough) recipe per week of something you’ve always wanted to learn to cook? And if you take the same path on your morning walk or run, why not try the one less tried? Your mind will love you for it.